Have you ever tried to support a friend on a weight-loss mission and gave her 'the look' on ordering her favourite chocolate cake while you were 'lunching-out' together...GUILTY (me, as charged), or maybe you were the mother who took her children on a 'guilt-trip' to arrive at what she 'believed' was the best for them, -or- you may be telling someone they will have to agree to YOUR terms 'or else!'.
Unsolicited advice- or worse..threats- robs a person from his/her GOD-GIVEN access to a wealth of wisdom that actually WORKS for THEM, the least damage would be a state of confusion and the worst a confidence crises, both leading to an impaired decision-making which backfires at our 'innocent' intentions that are tainted with our own judgements and agendas.
In a great class about the role of "ENTHUSING" in coaching (which is basically emotionally energizing our clients' dreams and goals with words of encouragement that reflect our genuine trust in human dexterity and resourcefulness), Ronnie Noize used a beautiful metaphor of a "matchstick and a bonfire" to portray how we help a cient grow his "ember" of motivation-which would otherwise be easily put-off by paralysing words of discouragement-into a blazing bonfire that would stand to winds of resistance and disapproval.
This untainted enthusiasm in a "process" of "focused attention" and "specific" goals (coaching) might be all we really need to reach beyond our goals and ambitions, "quickly and efficiently".
Your Presence Changes Things
6 months ago